Welcome 🥀

For years, I was stuck trying to write an “about,” a “bio,” a “headline.” that correctly reflected who I am and what I do.

The truth is I had no idea who I was. How could I?

When I have such a vast and rich inner wilderness of emotion and ideals and visions and dreams of a better world? When I can't hold a regular job for longer than two or maybe three years tops? When I tried and failed and tried and failed so many times at getting back up and building the strength to do better and be better and make my many dreams come true. Telling tales of "I've got this planned." and "I'm going to do this." and then not following through. "Back out." "Too scary." "No way." "I'm not worthy." "I couldn't do it then, I can't do it now." "I don't have what it takes." "They'll laugh at you." "They'll call you cruel and unimaginable things." I can write 1000 songs, but that's not enough... what do I DO? I researched for years, a hermit in her tower, tried and tried and tried to figure it out. Until I did.

One day, I woke up. I don't remember the exact day, but it was sometime at the start of 2025. I thought to myself, "You're a writer, stupid. Everything else is just a tool, a skill, a mode or medium, a part of your storytelling, your critiques, your directives, your perspectives. Your therapy. Your survival. You're not casual. You're ethereal. You live in the astral and imaginary realm of dreams and wonder and ideas. That's good. That's literary. That's important. Start writing. Don't let it make sense. Just write for yourself. See where it leads." And there it all was... the characters, the stories, the essays, all the things I've been wanting to say, but suppressed them for fear of more loss, more heartache, more loneliness, more bullying, more alienation, more self-sabotage, and more failure to launch.

Now that I have, I've decided I should have a little fun letting the mystery continue to unfold for everyone else until I announce my next creative projects.

I’ve been so afraid of being myself. Maybe you are too. But we have to do it. How can we expect the world to be real, raw, direct, romantic, honest, beautiful, righteous, true, etc. – if we aren't ourselves?

Explore the site. Browse my pages and profiles.
Stick around if something resonates.

I aim to leave you feeling curious, grounded, and real.
If something here moves you, great.
If not, that’s fine too.

If I've piqued your interest, I’m open to feedback, curiosity, or enthusiasm and I’d love to hear from you.

— Amanda